Tuesday, June 6, 2017

Happiness


Sipping my morning coffee here. Oh, yes, coffee. I'm sure it's been said "Coffee is proof God loves us and wants us to be happy." If it hasn't...you heard it here first. Or maybe it was beer that saying was meant for...either way, you've got to cherish even the littlest of happinesses.

     Truly speaking though, most of our adult lives we will daydream about trying to the find little happinesses. "One day, when I retire I'll..." or "If only I can finish this project at work I can..." or if you're like me "Once the kids get to school I can finally start and finish all my chores and errands" (That never happens) If we could devote our entire time and days to conquering our pursuit to happiness I think we would. But the truth about being a grown up is we rarely have time for ourselves. I'm reminded of when my youngest daughter huffs in her reluctance to do a task I asked of her "I can't wait till I'm a grown up so I can do whatever I want." Oh, bless. You've got to love that youthful ignorance. The many obligations that we HAVE to do to maintain the life of being a responsible adult will always trump that things we WANT to do. We all know this. We feel it daily. And we could feel despair in the thought that our dreams will need to be put off tomorrow.

     In my own realization of this in the last few years I have inventoried my own happiness. I began to think to myself and ask myself questions. When I was oh-so-much younger what did I think I was going to be or do? What sorts of cool things did I think being an adult would be like? Nothing I was doing was matching up to the dreamer I once was. Even worse, I had been so out of touch with who I really am that I couldn't even picture my future in my mind. It had to turned from playful thought to a serious life question. What did I want from life?  I never wanted much. I didn't want cheap thrills, to jump out of a plane, or even walk on tight rope across the Grand Canyon (No way! I'm not crazy). But, surely, life needs color and captivating experiences. Living a happy life should challenge you. It should relax you at times. It should even push you to new limits. Bucket lists should be crossed off while your younger not right before death. 



     As the story goes on...things changed for me gradually. I moved to the city. Something I always had dreamed of as a girl. It is every bit of perfect that I thought it would be. I was a single mother and of course that had it's struggles but I'll never forget what my eldest daughter said to me that told me I had made the right decision for our family "Mom, I see you're so much happier here than I remember you ever being." (Hello! Why didn't I do this sooner?!) Soon I opened my own photography studio and retired from the wedding industry after 12 years. Don't get me wrong here -- I loved wedding photography -- the people (my clients and guests) -- just not the fact that I never had an available weekend for my family. Transitioned my business to another venture. I begun painting again. I found a church that aligned with my innate beliefs. I begun photographing my happinesses again (my 3 kids and Kevin, the love of my life) because my passion for photography wasn't as much of a manufactured job anymore but a joy. I saw Billy Joel and Guns N' Roses in concert! I saw China, Japan, Singapore, Seattle, Pittsburg, Florida, Italy, Mexico, Aruba, and so many other places. I listen to books that I've always wanted to read but thought I never had the time to sit and actually read. And naturally, like any adult woman would do, I bought myself some Jimmy Choos and Loubountins. How else I'm I suppose to do all this "adult-ing"? Kev and I even got engaged and are getting married next year. The list is truly endless. And all along the way the I was challenging myself and by me being more of who I know I am. 

     Whatever it took to do "..whatever I want" I just did. Because now I realize the only one holding me back...well, was me.  There will always be the mundane things about the day to day but I've learned to pair it with all my dreams and the cool things I HAVE to do! Checking things off your Dreams List should be something you HAVE to do just as well as things as you don't want to do but got to do. 

So, make that list of dreams. Start doing them. If you're scared, start with the tiniest little things. I promise you'll find your happiness!



Photo Credit | Deven Coon-Donohue 
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1 comment

  1. Happy for you! This was such an inspirational post! It filled up my heart again and reminded me to live my dreams out. Thank you. ♡

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